Singalong A Strictly

 

Well. Here we are again, dance fans. Another week, another plethora of pasos, quantities of quicksteps and a fu...fudge ton of foxtrots. But not as many as we started with, of course. The waltzing wheat has gradually been separated from the cha cha chaff and we're down to the lucky seven remaining couples. Unusually for Strictly, the duffers seems to have been dispensed with in good time and there have been no WHAT WERE THEY THINKING eliminations. Yet. Not long now to see who will be hoisting the glitterball aloft as Strictly Champions of 2021. I bet Karim still tries to run on stage to congratulate the winners, and he's not even in it this year.

And so it's Musicals Week. Another theme shoehorned in to keep us watching. With any luck, we'll have not only heard of the shows but know the songs as well. I hope you all join in with the chorus and annoy your neighbours. That's my plan, anyway, after having to listen to ours twanging his banjo for hours. And no, that's not a euphemism. I'm just glad the harmonica phase was short-lived otherwise I'd be blogging this from Broadmoor.

So, what did happen? Come with me, and you'll see, there's a world of pure elimination...see, I've started already.

The evening got off to an extremely promising start with the opening Pro dance to Cabaret. My evening was quite made when Gio came out in a full face of make up and a mesh top under a waistcoat. As Jane Austen was fond of saying, I was quite undone. They really should put a warning on before stuff like this. Mind you, as a menopausal woman I could blame the sudden rush of blood to my face as a hot flush. Oh, yes. There were other dancers there too, all performing a Charleston-esque routine that was really good to watch. Oti was a firecracker as Sally Bowles and the dance was good fun. Unless you know how the film ends, of course.

Motsi's hair do was ENORMOUS this week! She looked like Crystal Tips (from the 70s kids' TV show of the same name) was trying to smuggle Alistair the dog into the studio. She looked EPIC!

There was no Craig this week, as he tested positive for Covid and was probably watching in his 'jamas at home with a Lemsip (other cold remedy drinks are available). Instead, we had the mega-talented, multi award winning Cynthia Erivo taking Craig's seat. I am REALLY looking forward to seeing her in the film version of Wicked. Fun fact #1 - the end note of Defying Gravity makes me cry every single time I hear it. Properly sung, I mean. Not Doris from down the Legion on a Saturday night singing. I don't know why or how it sets me off but that high E6 comes out and BOOM. Snotfest. And yes, I did have to Google what the note was.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, right. Strictly.

AJ & Kai kicked off the night Waltz to Edelweiss from The Sound of Music. I am still scarred by The Sound of Music after having to watch it every day as a kid for about a million and five weeks (okay it was six) after my - very much loved & missed - nana found out how to work the video player. That and Live & Let Die have me rocking in a corner. 

I almost forgot to take notes watching this dance. It was captivating. AJ looked stunning in a beautiful blue & white lace dress, with Kai dressed like Captain Von Trapp. This was a very stripped back waltz, looking simple but it was anything but. Kai pushes AJ every week and she puts the hours in to learn. The dance was lyrical, smooth, flowing and graceful. AJ finished all her lines beautifully, her frame was near perfection and her footwork exquisite. There was lots of content - whisks, fall-aways and contra-checks. AJ showed wonderful musicality & rhythm, and there was the requisite rise and fall. The chemistry between the pair was palpable and at the end both were very emotional. A very good opening to the show and earned 38 out of 40. The highest for a waltz in the series so far.

By the way, Cynthia can guest-judge any time for me. She was fair, knowledgeable, gave great feedback and scored appropriately - not your Donny / Alfonso 10s, 10s, 10s across the board for just coming out onto the dance floor. Heck, they probably gave the floor crew 10s for cleaning up the streamers & glitter - although those would be deserved.

Rhys & Nancy were up next with a  Jive to Footloose from...well, Footloose. I still can't listen to this without thinking of the karaoke episode of kids' (yeah, right) TV programme Regular Show. Another one for you to check out online. But, yeah, another frantic hyper energy style dance for Rhys. Had he finally listened to the judges and reined himself in? Had he 'eck as like. 

Right from the start this was - again - frenetic, frantic, frenzied. It's like he only has two gears - stop and full speed ahead. He gets so carried away with himself he doesn't actually perform a dance. Just gets on the dance floor, does the steps at a million miles an hour, taking up as much space as physically can, basically showing off. It was very fast and had loads of content, including knee slides and leaps, but his lack of control meant his feet were flat, his kicks loose and his retractions weak. He was ahead of the music & beat almost from the start, he was out of sync with Nancy and he made a few errors even Tess noticed. It wasn't a good showing and I bet Rhys was glad Craig was absent so he didn't get a total mauling. A low - for Rhys - 32 out of 40 scored.

It's not only Rhys who doesn't get the point - his feet don't either

Tom & Amy performed a Couple's Choice to On My Own from Les Miserables - or The Glums as it's known in our house. Cracking musical, great tunes but a proper downer of a play. I suppose the clue's in the title. Hasn't stopped me seeing it three times, mind. We learned in the VT that our Tom actually went to musical theatre school and trod the boards as Oliver - and also met his now wife there when they were 13. Tom broke down crying as he spoke about his sister, which made quite a few people think she had sadly passed. Thankfully, this isn't the case and she is in the West End performing. So, not quite sure what the tears were for but, then again, I'm an only child so have no sibling frame of reference. HOTH has three brothers & step-siblings though and he said he wouldn't start skriking about them at the drop of a hat.

I'm waffling on as I want to avoid taking about the dance - but I can't keep putting it off. It was a bit of a car-crash of a contempowaft. Both bare-footed (their soles were filthy by the end), they wafted about, waving their arms about, ducking up and down, grabbing & releasing. It was all a bit stage school and...well...forgettable. Tom had a 'smell the fart' look on his face throughout, while Amy did most of the dance heavy lifting. There was an impressive floating neck spin, but that was about it. It was too controlled, not fluid & free and it seemed like Tom was just going through the motions, rather than performing or believing in the dance. The judges agreed and he scored a low (for Week 9) 31 out of 40). Not even a, frankly very weird, VT from Russell Crowe saved the outing.

Rose & Giovanni followed with a Quickstep to Love Is An Open Door from Frozen. I am extremely proud to say I have never watched Frozen all the way through. Hearing wannabes - or should that be Elsa-bes -  screech their way through Let It Go on karaoke is bad enough. Or, as one Party Princess we saw in Bolton sang, Lerrit Gorr. A marked improvement on the original if you ask me. Just not my kind of film, Besides which, that annoying bloody snowman would get the heat gun treatment from me. 

Apart from Gio's odd centre-parted hair, this was my favourite dance of the night. From signing the speaking parts of the song to the final (mis)step this was an absolute joy to watch. It was just great fun and you could tell the pair had a whale of a time dancing it. It was light, slick and stylish with changes of pace that Rose wasn't fazed by. Tons of tricky content - spins, turns, skips, even The Robot at one point! There was fabulous story-telling, character and chemistry and the choreography was exciting to watch. A rare error by Gio tripping near the end stopped them from getting full marks and they scored 37 out of 40. So cute to see Rose reassuring Gio in the Clauditorium that he'd done well and not to worry about the mistake!

John & Johannes were up next with a Viennese Waltz to Chim Chim Cheree from Mary Poppins. MP again? Does someone in Strictlyland have shares in the film? Every flipping year someone dances to a tune from the show. There's LOADS more musicals out there. Though I suppose something from Jerry Springer, The Musical would get Complaints with a Capital C. Still, I wish they'd give it a year off. It didn't help that the Beeb put the sodding film on right before Strictly, either. I have to say, this wasn't John's best dance this week. Dressed as a chimney sweep - obviously - there was a lot of fanoogling (mucking about) with chimney brushes at the beginning, in the middle, at the end...you get the picture. It was decent enough - John is the only dancer who switches between leading and being led, which is very tricky, especially mid-fleckerl like he did during this routine. He may have been put off by singer Tommy's Cock-er-nee accent, which was only marginally better than Dick Van Dyke's effort in the film. It was pretty fast for a Viennese with loads of spins and turns. John finished all his lines nicely and he'd put a lot of work into his posture, frame & shaping. The transitions between moves was good and the dance flowed fairly well. There was a lack of glide across the floor and a few foot faults which the judges picked John up on. Their feedback was generally positive - they just want to see him perform more, and differently, in his dances to bring more light & shade. 32 out of 40 scored.

Not even I can resist posting a Dick pic

 

Tilly & Nikita brought us the night's second Couple's Choice to Revolting Children from Matilda. I need to see this musical. I love Tim Minchin - I've actually been in arm's length of him when we saw him as Judas in Jesus Christ Superstar. Alright, Mr Tickle's arm length but you get my drift. Disappointingly, Nikita did NOT dress as Miss Trunchbull, which missed a trick as far as I'm concerned. No, they were dressed as stereotypical school-kids. BORING! Neither the musical they chose or the costumes were a great stretch of the imagination. Now, according to the VT, Tilly's dad is...GORDON RAMSAY! I know, right? Shocker. Nobody's ever mentioned that before 😒. 

I'm not quite sure what the judges were watching, but I don't think it was the same thing as me. Look, I know I'm not a dance expert - and Couple's Choice ones are especially hard for an amateur to critique - but I know what I like and this wasn't it. I think it was Street Dance, but it just seemed like a load of running about, stomping, jumping on furniture and gurning. There didn't seem to be a lot of dance content. Yes, there was bags of energy. Yes, there was a cartwheel. Yes there was a Trust Drop. But it was all...meh, to me. The timing was good, Tilly was in sync with Nikita and her stamina has improved a lot since the beginning. I'm sure it was a lot of fun, if you like that kind of thing. But Shirley's comment that she couldn't tell which of the pair was the pro dancer was risible and seemed disingenuous. Maybe Gordo had paid off the panel because the dance was way overmarked with a full house 40 out of 40.

We don't need no education - we need a decent dance

Dan & Nadiya closed the night with a Charleston to Good Morning from Singin' In The Rain. If you want to see a really good dance to Singin' In The Rain, check out Spiderman's Tom Holland on Lip Sync Battle and wait for the segue. Trust me on this. 

Dapper Dan's dance was decent enough. There was a decent amount of content and it was energetic and lively. There could have been more swivel (which Craig no doubt would have mentioned) and attack in the moves, but he stayed in sync with Nadiya in the side by side sections and enjoyed himself while he was doing it. The lifts were good - quite challenging, too - and a nice little Fosse flair break that mixed things up a bit. He did a roly-poly on the sofa, something I haven't done since I was about six. I'd do myself a mischief trying something like that now and I'm only 5 feet tall, not eleventy billion foot tall like Dan. There did seem to be quite a bit of ploddy walking about at times where Dan looked a little unsure of himself, and he needs to finish his lines properly and watch his free arm. More overmarking from Shirley (a 9 for flip's sake) meant Dan finally broke the 30 barrier on his 'Journey' (thanks for pointing that out Tony) and he was given 31 out of 40.

And that was that. The curtain came down on Musicals week and we all went home for tea. The scores on the doors were:

Tilly & Nikita - 40

AJ & Kai - 38

Rose & Giovanni - 37

John & Johannes - 32

Rhys & Nancy - 32

Tom & Amy - 31

Dan & Nadiya - 31

Which, as we know, means the square root of bugger all one the viewers have voted.

Sunday dawned bright and very cold (cold in winter - who'd have thunk?). Meanwhile, in Strictlyland the votes had been counted and the pairs in peril were known. Last night, to be honest, but let's play along.

With a risk of being suitably terrified by The Weeping Angels in Doctor Who (I know it was on before Strictly but we were saving it) - the episode Blink where they were first introduced is probably the best one EVER in the show's history - I needed something a bit more sedate in the interim. Like Tess' announcements, for instance. I mean, she's meant to be building the tension, I get that. I just end up shouting 'I say, old girl. Would you mind awfully increasing your pace, just the tiniest amount? Thank you ever so much'. Or words to that effect. I might use one or two  that are usually represented by asterisks in print. The sixth letter of the alphabet gets quite the outing. Ahem.

We were treated to ANOTHER Pro dance opener, with routine to....Defying Gravity. I was OK though - the end note was nothing like a high E6 (still about 7 octaves higher than I can hit, though). Fully green Elpheba and glittery Ga-lind-a - if you've seen it, you'll know what I'm on about. Wafting, waving, flying. It had it all.

There was the obligatory recap and backstage comments. Then in roughly about the same time as it would take to walk to Saturn we finally learned that

RHYS was in the dance off. Not a great surprise, given the dog's dinner of a dance he'd delivered earlier. I mean last night. He has fans with the CBBC viewers, but he doesn't seem to have a similar following with the Strictly voters. He was obviously disappointed with his performance and landing in the dance off put the tin hat on it, as my grandad used to say. He tried to put a brave face and positive spin, but he looked crushed, bless him.

Tilly was up first for the Chatterpillar, which must be a nice change for her. She's been in the dance off a few times - sometimes undeservedly. She must have been relieved to have been saved first.

AJ was still emotional and buzzing - even after 24 hours 😉. Kai did his impressions of Anton & Shirley. I don't think Rory Bremner will be losing much sleep, but it was a bit of fun.

There was a guest slot from Max Harwood and The Feeling performing Out of the Darkness from the really rather good Everyone's Talking About Jamie. Loosely based on a true story, it's about a young lad from Sheffield who dreams about becoming a drag queen. Max starred in the film version as well, if you want to check it out, with a singing Sarah Lancashire & Richard E Grant in a frock. A couple of the spare pros lolloped about for a bit but, unfortunately, none in drag. Though that might have finished me off after Gio's cabaret turn-out.

The judges did their bit, expanding some on their earlier comments. It's still not my favourite bit, but I suppose they have to fill the time with stuff other than the elimination bit. Cynthia was refreshing, though, giving her insights as a performer. She can come again.

And do back down to Tess who......could......now......reveal.....that......the......second......person......in......the......dance.....off.....was.... 

<pause of the same duration of the Hundred Years War in slow motion>

TOM. Again, not a surprise. Down at the bottom of the leader board and, while he had scored one more point than Dan, the TV presenter appears to have a bigger fan-base. Probably all the 'aw bless him, he's a lovely chap' Breakfast Brigade who vote for who they like even if they'd have had a lie down mid routine, thrown a toddler tantrum and flicked bogeys at Dave Arch And His Wunnerful Orchestra. Tom took it on the chin and Cynthia gave him some really encouraging words.

Back with Claudia, Gio and Rose were like a pair of Labrador puppies, Rose doing impressions of his teaching faces and him saying 'Lovely Jubbly' which was a bit weird.

Dan has apparently had a curry named after him and can sing as well as dance. Saying that, if he sings like he dances, I'll take a rain-check, thanks.

John & Johannes were evidently relieved they'd been saved & John has promised to try to take the judges' comments on board.

And the dance off? Rhys had actually dialled it down a bit and showed some restraint. The errors had been ironed out, he stayed in sync and tightened up the kicks and flicks. A better performance all round. If only he'd remember how to control himself next week.

Tom tried to be more emotive and expressive. It worked to a degree, and there was a touch more light, shade and layers, but I still wasn't impressed by the choreography itself. Too......stop, start, stilted.

All was done. The fickle finger of fate lay with the judges. And it didn't take them long to decide to ditch.....

TOM - although Shirley said she would have booted Rhys instead. Perhaps to make Tom feel better, perhaps to put a rocket under Rhys to finally pay attention to the notes he's given. Who knows. It was an emotional farewell, especially from Amy who was in bits. It seems like Tom has been her favourite partner so far, and she loves his family too.

And that was that. We're down to the last half-dozen and the sharp end of the competition. Not long now before we'll crown our champion. Until next week, dahlings.....

KEEP DANCING!

McFly Me To The Moon - Tom departs the dance floor