There Can Be Only One

Well, here we are folks. The Strictly Come Dancing 2022 Grand Final. The Big One. The Top Banana. The Glitterball Giveaway. We've had laughter, drama, tears (blimey, have we had tears - I thought Ore Oduba was back). There's been injuries and infections, blood, sweat, trauma, toil and a stripping Tony Adams. I don't know about you, but this was one of the strongest years ever - discounting a couple of less able celebrities (cough, Kaye, cough). One by one, they were whittled down from fifteen to the final four. Hamza, Molly, Fleur and Helen. My prediction? A dancer with five letters in their first name would be lifting the trophy last night. Just call me Sceptic Seg.

I predict a riot good night

If you're a fan, you will have been watching and will know who won - or even glimpsed in the vague direction of the media, come to think of it. I'm still going to make you read to the end, anyway. Wait. You can scroll! Don't scroll! You'll miss some funny bits. Maybe.

The week started off well for Hamza. On the way to rehearsals he spotted a robin trapped in a window and heroically rescued it, showing us the best way to set our feathered friends free. Of course, I don't need his tuition. I'm an old hat at this kind of things. We have two cats. A couple of years ago I was lolling on the couch doing something important when I noticed the smaller one messing about near the TV cabinet. This is not unknown for him, he is not a conventional cat (he likes being wrapped up in blanket and held like a baby), but usually he fairly quickly finds something else to do. This time, he could not be shifted. I called him, chutched him, threw his toy ball near him. Nada. He was very interested in something over there. I got up to physically shift him, asking what he was doing - as you do when you have pets - and looked over the back of the telly. Where I got a faceful of panicked sparrow. 

I said a couple of naughty words and Spadge took off. Not wanting it to get hurt I started trying to catch it. Sparrows fly better than I can run after them. Round & round the front room, into the kitchen, up and down the stairs with me chasing after it. Probably to The Benny Hill theme tune. Eventually, it landed on a window sill and I gently scooped it up, taking it outside, back to its birdie buddies. Off it flew without so much as a tweet of thanks. Ungrateful little git.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes. The Final! Our remaining Fab Four would all be doing three dances each. One chosen by the judges that they wanted to see again, the Showdance and the couples' own favourite. Scores were for guidance only - this was the popularity contest of the year.

The night opened with the usual Journey VT, flashbacks, slo-mo sections and all that filler malarkey, then a purple pro dance. It looked like an explosion at The Cadbury Factory. The final pro dancers hoofed onto the floor, shaking their bits & pieces, then giant billboards with the celebs faces on - about 15 feet in the air - spun round to reveal them. All filmed in advance, of course. Four costume changes would have been madness.

On came Tess & Claudia who, for some reason, had come as the love child of Liberace & Evel Kenevil.

          

Who's The Daddy?

The judges came on, there was a bit of waffle and we were Off.

I'm not going to recap all the rambly bits, pre-training footage, chats with families, kids & grandparents and skriking We'd be here until next year's launch show if I kept all that it. You know what it would have been like and, besides, I didn't take notes.

Judges' Choice

Hamza & Jowita opened their campaign with the judges' pick of their Salsa (Sarrrrrrlsa if you're Anton & Craig) to Ecuador from week four. One of the ones I didn't blog on so I can't check back what his score was. It was the one with the big lifts, anyway. This time around Hamza was bigger, brighter, bolder, cheeky and flirty. Hamza's never had a problem with rhythm and musicality and this didn't change last night. He had bags of bounce, swags of swing, acres of energy and more salsa rolls than a branch of Chiquito's. He made the dance seem effortless, showcasing Jowita as well as himself, with loads of energy, sync and style. Then there were the crazy, crazy lifts - chucking Jowita about like she was a doll - higher, bigger and braver than before with added twizzly bits and spins. Crikey Blimey. A niggly Craig picked up on Hamza's flingy free arm and the pair scored 39 out of 40.

Molly & Carlos kicked off with their Quickstep to Love On Top by Beyonce which has earned then 32 out of 40 in week two. This time the tricky brollyography worked and this was a tighter, slicker outing of the number. Molly's frame was much improved - after a masterclass from Shirl - her top line steadier and her footwork cleaner. It was light and skippy, polished and tricky. Not a lot in hold, though and - for me - not a lot of the dancefloor was covered as you see in a conventional quickstep. The judges loved it, though, and a tiny bit of gapping dropped just one point, earning the pair 39 out of 40.

Fleur & Vito were up next with the Samba (Sarrrrmba) to Hot Hot Hot from week eight. Now, they'd scored 39 out of 40 last time out for this - and I did think the judges would have chosen one of her lower-scoring routines - so any improvement would be near microscopic. Dressed as The Very Hungry Caterpillar again, Fleur Proper Went For It. Her hips, rotation and isolation were better and her leg action  cleaner. She was sexier and freer, really putting full energy and performance into the routine, especially in her solo break section. It was technical, packed full of difficult content, changes of direction and speed. The pair were totally in sync and on beat. Craig was 'furious' he couldn't find anything wrong with it, and Shirley said she didn't have a paddle high enough. With Anton declaring it 'smoother than a Werther's Original' (other sweets are also available) the couple earned the first full house 40 out of 40.

Helen & Gorka closed Round One with their Jive to Tightrope from week seven (another non-blog week). Sharp and stylish in monochrome suits & hats, they started on the stairs and stage, moving almost as one. Helen has gained so much confidence during this series and, boy, it showed. She was slick, polished and precise with tight kicks, flicks and retraction. He weight was bang in the right place over her feet and her energy was higher. But by far the most improved was her attitude. She was sassy, cheeky, flirty and saucy. Every movement had little extra touches of flair and she eased through the routine's changes of jive style. A very healthy 39 out of 40 from the panel.

Showdance

All bets are off with a showdance. There are no rules or manuals and anything goes. So what did?

Hamza & Jowita wanted to show off his growth in the series (stop it) and picked his favourite style of dance with a Foxtrot-themed number to Let's Face The Music And Dance. This was a lovely, flowing, romantic dance in the classic Hollywood style. Unfortunately, Hamza made a fairly big error right at the beginning and it took him a while to put it right. Such a shame as this was a lyrical and graceful routine with spins, turns and changes of pace and direction that wouldn't have been out of place in La La Land. There were jump /catch lifts and an amazing, spinning overhead presse that went on for ages. Too many errors saw their score tumble and they got just 34 out of 40, Hamza apologising over and over for letting Jowita down.

Molly & Carlos pranced around to a medley of tunes by Prince. Starting off on a pair of Mick Jagger lips, the pair were weirdly dressed in black plastic with red rubber gloves. I suppose they were trying to shuck off Molly's cutesie girl next door image, but they just reminded me of Kim & Aggie from How Clean Is Your House.

                                 

Hmmm. Now, I know a lot of people will have loved this. It was technical, tricky and poppy. There was cane work, bits on the floor, solo sections and Molly had plenty of rhythm and bounce (she is, after all, a trained flipping dancer). She finally brought some of her own personality into the performance but it wasn't as fierce a routine as we'd been promised in the VT. The pair were out of sync on more than one occasion and there were timing issues. It all felt a bit flat and lacked polish & finesse. I'll be honest, I was expecting more. Wild overscoring by Motsie and 37 out of 40 was scored.

Fleur and Vito performed a Rumba / Paso / Argentine Tango mash up for their showdance to Find Me. Whoooooooo. This was powerful, intense, passionate and fiery from the first note to the last. Fleur had tons of attack, attitude, presence and drive in this dance which was sexy, sultry, steamy and almost Too Much for a pre-watershed slot. Fair steamed up my glasses, it did. There was drama, darkness, danger with Fleur coping brilliantly with very difficult choreography. She was tight, controlled, stylish with great ganchos, frame, shaping and poise. The pair were so involved they were sobbing and the end. Craig gave Vito very high praise indeed for the routine, which included a jumpy-in-the-air-clicky-kick thing Vito did that I didn't catch the name of. Impressive, though, earning the pair 39 out of 40.

Helen & Gorka shone in their showdance to Shine (see what I did there?). This was a sweet, light and floaty number, Helen looking pretty and feminine in a lovely, swirly dress. It was a joyful routine full of beautiful lines and moves, with changes of pace & direction, light and shade. Helen's feet were fab and her frame, top line and placing were all spot on. It was a frivolous dance - in a good way - that brightened the mood and lifted the spirits (vodka & lemonade, if you're buying, please). Unfortunately, there were some sticky bits getting into and out of the lifts and the couple got 37 out of 40.

Pairs' Pick

I'd normally call this Couple's Choice but, since most of the pairs were recapping their, well, Couple's Choice (Molly being the exception) that would have been a bit of an overkill. 

Hamza & Jowita finished their night to the routine they had done to Jerusalema. This was a decent dance the first time round. Last night it was so much more. Every move was full of joy and soul with an easy rhythm that was great to watch. The connection between the two was clear and they were totally in sync throughout. Hamza moved with style and grace, dancing with his whole body and spirit. It was light, flowing, smooth and sensational, moving and clean. More fantastic lifts ramped up the difficulty and the scores followed suit. With everyone emotional, including the judges, a fab full house 40 out of 40 was awarded. Let me tell you, if Hamza was a religion I'd be the first to sign up.

Molly & Carlos recapped their rumba to All The Man That I Need. Again, I am not a fan of the rumba and this one won't change my mind. It was more or less the same as the last time, just a little tighter and controlled. There were no extra bits or flourishes other couples seemed to have added to make it Stand Out More. It was technical, there were some tricky parts, balances and counter-balances and Molly showed more character, performance and delivery. Not one I'd have picked to end my run in Strictly, but they earned 39 out of 40.

Fleur & Vito, cleverly, had chosen their full house scoring Couple's Choice from Blackpool to a Destiny's Child megamix. No backing dancers this time meant the pair were front and centre in the routine, which had to be amended to a twosome. Full on Sasha Fierce, Fleur was, somehow, even better in this outing. With total sass, attitude, focus and determination Fleur owned the floor, in dance that was tight, polished, precise and slick. The couple were in sync for every single beat, dancing with flair (Fleur Flair) and attack. It was sooo good that even Craig & Motsi were joining in on the podium. What else could it score but 40 out of 40? Well, Shirley tried to give a 12,and who can blame her?

Helen & Gorka closed the show, and indeed the series, with a reprise of their sensational Couple's Choice to Mein Herr. Again, no backing dancers, but it was great as the spotlight was firmly on the pair. They went hell for leather this time, Helen really performing her heart out - sexier, bolder, bigger, with more attack, attitude and swagger. She controlled Gorka, fully out front and focussed, tongue in cheek and loving every minute. What a way to end the show and the series - as well as send a huge Eff You to her ex. Craig made a joke critique about her little finger - but said it was a 'dance that should win a final', sparking a thunderous ovation from everyone in the room and the celebs shouting Helen's name over  & over. 40 out of 40 on the scoreboard.

And that was that. All the couples had danced their three routines and had done everything they could to win the viewer votes. It was all a waiting game for the next half-hour or so. Imagine the nerves? No 'waiting until tomorrow' for the final The votes were being counted and verified while all the other gubbins was going on. Why can't they do that every week? It's not like we need it to be spread over the whole weekend.

Apparently, Florence & The Machine did some singing - with Flo belting it out like a whale in labour, as she does. Her poor neighbours. I have to turn the volume down when she comes on the radio. I think they can hear her on Alpha Centauri. In fact, that's what First Contact is going to be. Never mind little green men or ET, it'll be some peed off aliens coming down to tell her to put a flipping sock in it. I say 'apparently' - we fast forwarded that bit cos we'd paused it earlier while we had our curry. Perfect timing.

                         

Oi, Welch! Keep it down, we're trying to get the baby to sleep!

While we were waiting, the cast of 2022 came back and, for probably the first time, I remembered all of them. Kaye still can't dance, Richie reminded us he went too soon, Matt was more relaxed, Jayde had fun (sans nose boops, thankfully), James is still more wooden than Ikea, Ellie S was bubbly, Tony looked like a stunned mullet, Tyler shook his stuff, Ellie T was camper than Butlins, Kym was under the sheets and Will dad danced. All jolly good fun and more entertaining than, say, the news. Or Michael McIntyre. Although root canal surgery without anaesthetic is more fun that him.

Then it was finally time to announce the winner. With much more alacrity than usual, Tess told us that the Strictly Come Dancing Champions of 2022 were.....

HAMZA & JOWITA!

Probably not the biggest surprise in history. Hamza has been a firm favourite with the public since week one and he's a very good dancer. Even if he doesn't believe it himself. One big, hot, sobbing mess. And Hamza was tearful as well.

And that's that for another year, my friends. I don't blog the Christmas Special - and not just because I've been on the Bailey's since breakfast. There are fewer couples, cheesier routines that threaten my lactose intolerance and the winner is chosen by the captive audience. Plus I've only heard of a couple of the celebrities. No. I shall hang up my notebook until next year. Until then...

KEEP DANCING!

Championis! Championis!

The Famous Five Go Dancing

 

I shouldn't really have used this photo. I've got the theme tune stuck in my head now. 'We are The Famous Five. Julian, Dick and Anne, George and Timmy the Do-o-o-og'. I much preferred The Comic Strip's version - Five Go Mad...' I think you can still find it online. French & Saunders, Ade Edmondson, Peter Richardson, the suave bloke off of out of Crossroads and the recently departed, much loved Robbie Coltrane. A barbed but very funny dig at Blyton's gang where everything was accompanied by 'cake and lashings of ginger beer'.

Anyway, hello my fine fandango friends. How goes it? I don't know about you, but I have totally lost track of the days of the week now. I was thinking 'why am I working on a Sunday?' Except it's not, is it? It's Monday and I'm all discombobulated. It's worse than that week between Christmas and New Year. Which, apparently, is called Merryneum by some folk. That sounds too much like something bottom related for me. Chrimbo Limbo is better. Or 'Is There Any Baileys Left?' And we'll soon be there won't we? We've not even got our tree up yet. But Krampus is taking shape for next week. I shall post pics.

Guess what the highlight of my week has been? Yes, that's right. Hiring a skip! I know. Jealous aren't you? We're having a pre-festive clear out and thought we'd do a Proper Job of it. I hired a small skip. It's now completely full to the brim with just the stuff from my office! AND we took four full bags of tat stuff to the charity shop. We're going to have to get another one for the rest of the crap. A very big one if we're tackling the cupboard under the stairs as well. Or the one in the kitchen where we have boxes for phones and tech we got rid of years ago. There's also my very first Nokia mobile phone. No, not the ever reliable 3310 (which, along with cockroaches and Twinkies would survive a nuclear strike). THIS beauty...

It's a Nokia 6110 from the late 1990s and weighs a whopping 310g, most of which is the battery. Texts took blimming ages to send and not many people I knew had mobiles so there wasn't a lot of point to it, really. Still, I probably could have used it as a cudgel I needed to. Whack someone round the head with that and they're going to have one hell of a lump and tweetie birds circling their noggin.

But enough reminiscing. Back to Strictly, what happened, what they scored and who had their Glitterball hopes smashed at the final hurdle? The remaining five couples had to dance two different routines this week - well, they've got to fill the time slot somehow. Just over one week to learn two numbers? Could they pull it off? Well, let's take a look through the rectangular window...

Fleur & Vito kicked off proceedings with a Paso Doble to The Time Is Now by Moloko. Fleur started off confidently with a solo skirtography slot, putting lots of energy, attack and intent into her moves. There was plenty of drama and attitude, Fleur doing well with the character and story-tellling. Her promenades and Paso walks were decent and her footwork wasn't bad. It all got a bit weird when Vito started dragging her around by the skirt. She looked like a woman who'd caught her dress in a taxi door.

It wasn't perfect, though. Her shaping wasn't rounded enough for a Paso, she cut her Spanish lines short and didn't finish them properly. Her knees needed to be a bit softer and she lost balance a few times. Mad overmarking by Tony Beak meant the couple scored 35 out of 40.

Helen & Gorka were up next with a Waltz to Only One Road by Celine Dion (or Sealion Diane as she's referred to in our house).  This was a soft, flowing, elegant routine with some nice romantic storytelling. Helen had lovely footwork, managing the heel turns well and closing her feet where it was needed. There was lots of lovely light & shade, changes of direction and light, lyrical movements. Helen's frame was pretty good throughout and her timing was spot on. I lip-read a lady in the audience saying 'That was amazing' and I tend to agree. There were some gapping issues and Shirley would have like some more sway. The panel awarded 35 out of 40, with Anton scoring the pair less than Fleur, who had made obvious mistakes. I can't fathom his thinking.

Hamza & Jowita followed with a Charleston to Pencil Full Of Lead by Paolo Nutini. If ever a song was perfect for a Charleston, this is it. Well. Wow. Yet again the Humble Hamster smashed it out of the park. Dressed in a kilt - a brave choice if he wore it traditionally - he absolutely went hell for leather in this routine. With very 'jivey' undertones it had corking choreography and Hamza made it his own including little extra touches like the head bobs & finger wags. He was clearly loving it, his infectious beaming smile lighting up the studio. He had plenty of attitude, attack and Charleston energy pulling out pretty much every step in the handbook. Tons of Hamza charisma shone as he wellied it over the floor (that's a technical term). His timing, sync and character were bang on point and he never missed a single beat. You don't need me to tell you how good the lifts were - one incredible one where Jowita bounced up & down off the floor in hold and one weird one where Hamza twazzed her around like a Henrietta Hoover.(Bet you're impressed with my knowledge of  the lingo aren't you?). Picky, picky Craig said Hamza had a lazy left foot in the swivel, but the pair got a whopping 39 out of 40.

Strictly bosses come up with an inventive way to sweep up the confetti

Molly & Carlos' first dance was an American Smooth to Easy On Me by Adele. I don't mind Adele as a whole, but I'm starting to think she should give over on the mourning the lost love lyrics. She's starting to sound like a stalker. And like an asthmatic donkey on this one. 'Go <deep breath in> heeeeeeeee-eeeeee-eeeezy on me babe'. Cheer up love, it's nearly Christmas. So, anyway. Team Mollusc. This was an elegant number - it took a bit to get going with some faffing on the stage bit, mind - with nice interpretation of the music by Molly. Her arms, hands & frame were lovely, finishing moves right to the tips of her fingers. Her shaping was good and her footwork was decent. The lifts were a bit simple for me. I mean, I'm not expecting Hamza style chucking up to the lighting rigs, or even Danny Mac catching a leaping Oti but - and I will stress this is probably just me - they just seemed to be Carlos picking her up, doing a bit of a turn and putting her down again.The choreography didn't seem to work, either. There was a lot of stop / start stuff and Molly standing still while Carlos fannied about which spoiled the flow of the dance. The couple scored 35 out of 40 with an inexplicable 10 from Anton (mate, you handing out 10s like sweeties is not going to influence the viewer vote).

Will & Nancy finished the round of routines with a Paso Doble to Uccen Dancing With The Stars Remix by Taalbi Brothers. Erm...let's just say this wasn't his best dance to date. There was some reet weird capeography at the start which was really messy. Will looked like a cross between a Marvel baddie struggling with Dr Strange's cape and a kid pretending to be Batman with a bin bag tied round his neck.

                                         

What a caper!

Will had a good go at the routine but he was WAY over the top in his attack, drive and intent, meaning the dance became aggressive, uncontrolled and erratic. Not so much a matador as a bull in a china shop, on steroids, with a bad hangover. With his 'smell the fart' face back on show, he clomped, stomped and barged his way around the dancefloor. His flamenco sections were okay and he was in sync with Nancy when out of hold. In hold, though, his shaping totally collapsed in on itself, his arms weren't straight and got flingy and his footwork went awry. He was too tight, too controlled and too stiff (oi, careful now). This time it was Motsi's turn to overmark with a nine, but only 32 out of 40 was scored, leaving Will disappointed in himself.

Round two and Fleur and Vito were back with a Charleston to Tu Vuo' Fa L'Americano which translates to You Want To Play The American and has lyrics saying 'You wear jeans with logos on the back pocket / And wear a cap with the peak raised up'. Which proves my point that some things are best left in their native language. Now, this was a much better outing from Fleur. Her nerves seemed to have calmed and she went all out to deliver this dance. From Vito frantically shovelling spaghetti in his gob at the start to the last note this was a fun, full on routine. Fleur was out to impress this time and she jolly well did. Fizzing with energy, she stormed & swivelled through the number, handling difficult choreography and tricky lifts like she'd been practising for months instead of days. It was frivolous, feisty and nothing like the one Neil from The Inbetweeners did in the film. A near-perfect 39 out of 40 was scored by Team FleurVito (of which an anagram is Evil To Fur, Mate in case you were wondering).

Back to the floor for the second time were Helen & Gorka with their Argentine Tango to Here Comes The Rain Again by Eurythmics. Helen had a strong start, looking sexy & sultry in her opening solo slot. She had plenty of passion, attack and intent, her ganchos were good and she was tight and together with Gorka. She coped well with the pace of the dance and its change of rhythm and direction but her posture slipped a bit and she started to hunch her shoulders. An unfortunate moment where her heel got caught in her dress seemed to put her off and into her own head again. The audience booed Craig and even Shirley (which Craig encouraged) and, despite the errors the couple gained 37 out of 40.

Hamza & Jowita calmed things down this time with a Waltz to What The World Needs Now by Burt Bacharach. This was a lovely contrast to their first dance which really showcased Hamza's versatility and talent. This was a gentle, sweet, romantic routine which flowed across the floor. Hamza nicely closed his feet and his fleckerl was fab. He's definitely listened to the judges and finished his lines, extending his arms, hands and fingers all the way through. He lost his frame and shaping a couple of times, though, and there were quite a few footwork faults. The judges weren't too savage, though, and still awarded 37 out of 40 with Craig giving Hamza high praise by saying he doesn't just dance the steps, he dances the music too. The bloke's a natural.

Molly & Carlos rounded off their night with a Paso Doble to Survivor by 2WEI ft Edda Hayes. Which I thought was quite apt for the Duchess of the Dance Off. And Molly showed us while she's still here, despite being in the bottom two on four occasions. There was more drama than an entire history of Eastenders, more passion than a bodice-ripper. Woah, Nelly. Well, Molly. She was out to prove herself in her last dance of the semi-final and did so with aplomb. And Carlos as well. This was tight, controlled, fiery and fierce, Molly shying away from her usual 'cute girl next door' personality. Her timing, spotting and attitude were excellent and her footwork - including very difficult promenades and counter-promenades - was polished and precise. This was a clean, sharp and masterful performance which earned her a near top-of-the-shop 39 out of 40, only Craig keeping his Big Ten under the desk.

Will & Nancy closed the show with their Couple's Choice to a medley of Madchester Music. With Happy Mondays' Mascot Bez in the audience with his maracas Will really wanted this one to go well. And it did. His costume brought a whiff of nostalgia for me (my tattooist & I agree the 90s were the last best decade for good music) and his cheeky Manc swagger throughout the routine made the number. This was a street-dance style Couple's Choice, full of style and attitude. His energy was high, his timing was spot on and he was totally in sync with Nancy. There was tons of content and, while it got a bit PJ & Duncan for me in parts, it was good fun and Will performed it with his tongue firmly in his cheek. The judges loved it, too, and the pair earned 38 out of 40. But will it be a Happy Monday for them?

            

Let's Get Ready To Rhumble In Romiley

So, after a plethora of Pasos, a couple of Charlestons and a whole lotta Waltzes the leaderboard looked like this:

Hamza & Jowita - 76

Molly & Carlos - 75

Fleur & Vito - 74

Helen & Gorka - 72

Will & Nancy - 70

All very close but, as we know, everything can change after the viewer votes are added. Did it though? Let's see.

And so Monday began, Mondayingly. I had to type this thing straight after work - see how dedicated I am? I looked like that cat on the laptop meme. I usually do this while I'm relaxed on the couch sipping lattes and a bacon butty from Greggs. So the pressure was on to meet my self imposed deadline. I'm almost like a journalist. Speaking of deadlines -  I'm also Beta reading author Adrian Cousins' next book (I Beta read as a hobby - it's like a last pair of eyes before publication and combines my two favourite pastimes of reading and finding fault). No spoilers here for that one, but I highly recommend you check out Adrian's other books such as Jason Apsley's Second Chance, Ahead Of His Time and Force of Time. Great books full of escapism and nostalgia - and no, he's not paying me to plug him. I want to share my very good taste in literature.

Me this evening

The results show started with a recap of the night before and NO pro dance. It made the show feel a little flat & rushed. I like watching the professionals getting to grips with bonkers choreography - We Don't Talk About Bruno is still my favourite of this year.

The judges vox-popped their opinions of the semi-final routines again and there was the usual back stage 'after the fact' bits with the celebs discussing their scores and how it made them feel.

Tess was not fazed with the show being broadcast a day later (I wonder if they all got double time for working on a Sunday) and dragged her announcements out like an anaesthetised sloth. We finally learned that the first couple in trouble were...

FLEUR & VITO. The semi-final is almost the sharpest edge and only the good dancers remain. It could have been any one of the remaining five in the Dance Off. Nobody is assuredly safe now and we know the couples going out will be talented hard workers. This time it just happened to be Fleur's turn. Again. Tess didn't help rubbing their faces in it that they might be packed off.

Molly had been announced safe first and went into full on screaming histrionics and Carlos bursting into snotty tears. Hamza was tearful but restrained and grateful. In the Clauditorium Molly was shaking with excitement and Carlos was still in tears, almost inarticulate with joy. It is his first year after all. Hamza was, as always, humble and touched. His (platonic) love for Jowita was palpable and actually quite moving to watch.

Our musical interlude was brought to us by the always fabulous Lewis Capaldi. Fab voice, great personality, wicked sense of humour. I reckon he'd be a good Strictly contestant, except they wouldn't be able to show any VT and would have to cut his mic as he gets a little bit...sweary. Another reason I like him. He's definitely going on my 'messy night out' invitation list. Oh, and Gio and Katya did some dancertising while Lewis belted out his ballad.

The Judges Corner was a bit like speed dating this week, short and to the point with not much of note being said. Motsi enthused over Molly, Shirl purred about Fleur, Anton wittered on about Waltzes and Craig chattered about Will's Couple's Choice. There was a round up of the judges' best bits, including Craig's Mega-Boo.

There were only two couples left to pick from and we were finally told that the other pair in the dance off were...

WILL & NANCY. Will was obviously down after hearing this, but this is his first time in the dance off. He did have the lowest score on the night and had shown some weaknesses not seen for a few weeks. He'd pulled it back with the Couple's Choice but not enough for the viewers.

As the results show is filmed straight after the live programme the couples had to dance whatever they'd done last. A Charleston for Fleur, a Couple's Choice for Will. Both strong routines, both high scorers. Who would prevail?

The pairs came out fighting - not literally, although that might be an idea for next year. Fleur had more swivel this time but got a bit frantic in a couple of places. Will added even more swagger and Manc-isms. They couples both performed their absolute best to impress the judges and stay in with a chance of lifting the Glitterball. It was going to be a close call and all the judges expressed how hard it was for them to make their decisions. If they could have saved both couples, they would have done. It was down to micro-moves.

In another split decision it was down to Shirley to give the thumbs down to one couple. And that was...

WILL & NANCY. So very near and yet so far. It must be really gutting to go home at this stage. Will was disappointed and a bit choked up -  he kept apologising to Nancy for messing up but she was sobbing, too, as she so wanted to get him to the final. But, it is what it is. He did bloody well and impressed a lot of people.I'm sure they'll be on the tour.

Fleur & Vito were utterly gobsmacked by the decision - it looked like they'd resigned themselves to going out. I'm not disappointed I get to see Vito for another week, anyway.

And that was that. Next week is the Grand Final and the crowning of our 2022 Champions. I am really looking forward to it - especially the Show Dances. I'm expecting Hamza to hurl Jowita into low earth orbit at the very least.

So, until then my little Chupa-Chups....

KEEP DANCING!!

Will.I.Am Going Home

Advent-ures In Dancing

 

Hello everyone! IT'S DECEMBER!! Nearly that time when some random beardy bloke commits multiple Breaking & Entering offences, drives / flies under the influence of millions of shots of alcohol (we used to leave a hefty slug of Jack Daniel's and a Bailey's for Mrs Claus) and dumps gaudily wrapped tat in your gaff. All in one night. Nice work if you can get it. Anyone else would be looking at a very long stretch at His Majesty's Pleasure.

I have not one, but two advent calendars this year. A jam & preserves one and a gin one. I'm practically a one-woman branch of the WI. HOTH gets the preserves I don't like. There is no such thing as a gin I don't like, so he's out of luck there. I do manage to hold off drinking it until the evening, though, despite it being in my Work From Home office. I say office. It's the spare bedroom. Which currently looks like a satellite branch of Amazon it has that many parcels stacked dangerously ready for wrapping and shoving under the tree. Which is still in the dump we call the cupboard under the stairs. You know, that place you scramble to hide the mess in when you're expecting company. There's even a word for that action - scurryfunging. And we are World Champions. HOTH has to hire a team of sherpas to help him get the decorations out of there.

Since it's almost time for us to put the tree up and hang the decorations, it's also almost time to put our outside mannequin up. Yes, you read that right. Most years we drag the mannequin out of the shed and dress it up in suitably themed attire. We've done Father Christmas, Buddy The Elf and, one memorable year, The Shepherd Who Had Seen Too Much.

At least it scared the carol singers off

After the last few years I think we'll go for Krampus this year. Sets the right tone, don't you think?

And so, onto Strictly. After reminding you last week that it's on Friday night because of the fubble, I durn near forgot myself! That would have been a tad embarrassing, wouldn't it? Me settling down Saturday night with a creme de menthe and pince-nez glasses to switch the telly on and find a load of blokes running around a field. Mind you, I'd probably have just thought Jason Gilkison had finally lost the plot when choreographing the pro dance. He's done worse.

We're at the Quarter Finals now and it's getting very serious. Two weeks to go until somebody gets their sticky mitts on the Glitterball, after months of blood, sweat, tears and trauma, all in the name of entertainment. Oh, and the nice paycheque. They don't do this just for the lurve of dance, you know. Even Tess & Claudia are paid more than the average UK surgeon. I'm in the wrong job.

Sorry, I digress. Strictly. Quarter Final. Dancing. Right. I'm back on track.

It's Musicals Week and, for once, they have strayed beyond Mary Poppins and Matilda. If I had to watch another chimney sweep or dancing on a school desk themed routine I'd lose the plot. And they NEVER do anything from The Rocky Horror Show. Although that might be a good thing. Imagine Anton as Frank N Furter? MY EYES!! MY EYES!!

                                     

More stomach turn than Time Warp - let's hope Tone doesn't get any ideas

(If you have been affected by any of these images, please don't call me, I have problems of my own)

The opening pro dance was to a medley of show tunes from The Greatest Showman, Everyone's Talking About Jamie (dancing on bloody school desks), Grease, Hamilton, Six, Rent, Legally Blonde, Dreamgirls and Kinky Boots. There was singing, dancing, glitter, confetti, sparkle bars, the works. Bit understated, if you ask me. Although, true story, I have held the star of ETAJ, Layton Williams when he was nobbut a nibbet - I worked with his nana. So I'm adding him to my list of people I'm virtually related to by dint of knowing their rellies.

Anyway, as we were oft reminded, our couples had one fewer day's training due to the rescheduling. Would this have any effect? Well, we shall see.

Molly & Carlos provided the night's overture with a Charleston to Hot Honey Rag from Chicago. This was previously done in 2015 by Georgia May Foote & Joe Varney, which scored 39 and is WELL worth another watch. This was a pretty good outing, too. Molly loves the fun, ditsy, happy, smiley numbers so had been looking forward to doing a Charleston. All the couples had extra dancers for this week, too, which added another dimension. The expected moves were in there - birdy flaps, pot stirrers, groove walks, swing twists, tricks & flips and the all important swivel. There was even a cartwheel. Molly was bright, bold & brassy, dancing in sync with Carlos and keeping up with the fast tempo. This was a difficult routine, which Molly handled confidently and seemingly with ease. A jolly start to the night earning the pair 38 out of 40, which had Carlos sobbing so much he nearly forgot their (grits teeth) patented heart pose.

Hamza & Jowita were up next with a Samba to They Live In You from The Lion King. Fortunately, somebody must have had A Word with the costume department and Hamza escaped the stupid animal onesie poor Richie had been saddled with. Mind you, if Hamza does have a spirit animal it is surely the Quokka. The smiliest creature in the Animal Kingdom with more than a little resemblance to Hamza.    

                                   

This was a fabulous dance. Hamza nailed the choreography, which had every samba move you could wish for. He was graceful, powerful, smooth and in control from start to finish. His posture was beautiful, his footwork was sleek and his legs were fabulous. The samba rolls were gorgeous and Hamza's hipwork - including side-to-side and figure-of-eight moves were lovely to watch. His arms were fluid, his lines finished and his transitions were seamless.There was just the right amount of bounce, all in the right places. Hamza's upper body was so still he could have carried a trifle on his head with no spillage. For me, this was Simba-ly the best, but the judges found little niggles and he scored 36 out of 40.

Kym & Graziano were back from being poorly-sick-and-can't-eat-custard, bringing a nostalgic Cha Cha Cha to Fame from Fame. In full on 80s garb with big hair, cropped jumper, leotard and leg warmers, Kym was trying to make sure we remembered her name, alright. This seemed to be a disco-based Cha Cha Cha but had enough content to stay on the right side of the judges. Her legs were nice and straight, her hips, isolation and rotation were good, too. Apparently, she's a gran (she only mentions it, like, every week) but she has bags & bags of energy and stamina, easily keeping up with Graziano and the backing dancers. Her solo spots were good, but her weight was a little too far back in places which sent the timing off a tad. For me, it could have been a bit 'bigger', but the judges loved it, awarding 34 out of 40.

Will & Nancy followed with a Foxtrot to Sun And Moon from Miss Saigon.  Will always dances better when he can connect with the music and tell a story, and this really showed in this routine. This was a touching and romantic dance, with emotional light and shade. Will had great arms & top line throughout the number and his footwork was sublime. He had obviously worked really hard and it paid off. His heel turns were tight and on point, he brought his feet together nicely and flowed across he floor, leading Nancy like a pro. His timing was spot on and his performance of the narrative was engaging and a pleasure to watch. The panel heaped praise upon praise and the couple scored a near-perfect 39 out of 40.

My absolute favourite dance of the night - and definitely of the entire series so far - was an absolutely magnificent Helen & Gorka with their Couple's Choice to Mein Herr from Cabaret. Erm, who are you and what have you done with the real Helen Skelton? My Gods. This was an incredible routine, full of content, drama, style, story and downright filth. Helen was completely unrecognisable to previous weeks - sexy, sultry, controlled and controlling, an extremely confident femme fatal.

Almost dominatrix-like (I once accidentally went to a  family-friendly fancy dress party at a church dressed as a dominatrix, but that's a story for another day), Helen absolutely owned this dance, Gorka, the backing dancers, the whole floor and the entire audience. From the first note to the last, Helen was completely in character, on beat, in time and in sync with her partner and those around her. She played the the dance up, with nods & asides to the camera and looked like she was enjoying every single second - and so was everyone else. The dance got faster and faster, the tricks and moves more complex, nods to Fosse, Charleston and Burlesque. Just...bloody brilliant. A tiny criticism from Craig got him the biggest, loudest, longest boo I have ever heard in the history of Strictly and possibly the worst he's had in his career. He looked really embarrassed and abashed - even more so when he failed to pull out the 10 paddle. A cracking 39 out of 40 which SHOULD have been a full house. I made HOTH rewind the show at the end so I could watch it all over again. I mean. it's up there with Danny & Oti's American Smooth for me, and that's saying a lot.

Fleur & Vito brought the curtain down on the night with a Quickstep to I Got Rhythm from An American In Paris. Fleur looked gorgeous in a lovely 50s style dress and danced with lovely 50s style grace. This was a proper Hollywood Big Sound Stage routine, full of content, changes of pace & direction, light & shade. Fleur pulled out a great performance, glowing and confident as she fair flew across the floor on feather-like feet. Her posture and poise were on point, she was great both in and out of hold and was very polished in a dance that was slick, speedy and smooth. Fleur's characterisation was joyful, big in a good way and she played it to the gods. Probably her best dance after Blackpool, this outing earned her 38 out of 40.

All in all, this was a cracking night with top drawer performances from all the couples. The mood in the Clauditorium was hyped, everyone clearly having as fab a night as we were. But someone still has to go home.

And so it was Saturday, which is usually Sunday. Today's advent goodies were Welsh Wind gin and an apricot & linden flower jam. No, me either. And Google provides conflicting information. It's apparently like chamomile with black liquorice notes. I've not been brave enough to try it yet.

We were treated to another pro dance to Luck Be A Lady Tonight and Sit Down You're Rockin' The Boat from Guys & Dolls. With most of our pro dolls dressed as guys. There was the usual recap of the previous night with extra comments from the panel. Then it was down to business.

You know the drill by now. Tess took her own sweet time while the couples endured Squeaky Bum Time waiting to see who was in the dance off. Finally, after Everest had been reduced to sand by the ravages of time we found the the first pair in peril were...

MOLLY & CARLOS. Again. Even after that wee cracker last night, she's not captured the audience. It must be disheartening, especially for Carlos in his first season as a pro dancer on the show. Maybe it's the ringeriness (I'm not sure that's a real word but spellcheck didn't pick it up so I'm going with it), the stage school engrained wobbly eyes and shiny teeth persona or the flipping Vote For Us heart pose that's putting people off. She plastered on a smile but Carlos looked peed off.

The Clauditorium gets less and less crowded these days. Will was wondering what it will take to get him to the final. Helen is taking Gorka to her farm next week, possibly NOT in the outfit he was wearing. Mesh is a reet bugger to get sheep muck out of. 

Tonight's musical moments were provided by stars of The Cher Show. Sadly, not a chronicle of her ever changing facial features. Mind you, that would need a cast of thousands. We had Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves, I Found Someone and Believe, all with gyrating gymnastics from its cast of dancers. Fair made me want to order a prawn cocktail, steak and chips and Black Forest gateau like the Dinner And A Turn nights out from the 70s.

Judges were back this week. Shirley drooled over Hamza (not literally, thank goodness). There was praise for Molly from Motsi, Anton explaining Will's Three Step - I'm still no clearer - and Craig trying to mitigate his meanness to Helen. He still looked embarrassed when they replayed the clip and admitted it was his biggest boo and it shook the rafters.

Back to the eliminations. In a time span longer than that between The Big Bang and when the cats woke me up to get their breakfast this morning Tess announced that the second couple in the dance off were...

KYM & GRAZIANO. It must have been a close call, although they were bottom of the leaderboard, albeit on 34 out of 40 - Tony stayed in with fewer points. This was all going to be down to the judges' decision.

The Claud crew Hamza expressed his amazement and gratitude at still being in the competition. Fleur thanked everyone and leaked the secret that it's a good job Vito can dance when she sets him a singing challenge.

And so to the Dance Off. Both couples managed to pull out something extra from somewhere - Molly getting her elbows up to Craig-pleasing positions and upping the oopmh, Kym putting in more rotation and performance. Both couples really trying and fighting for a place in next week's semi-final.

The judges deliberated, cogitated and decided. With a split decision, it was down to Head Judge Shirley to choose her victor and the couple sent home were...

KYM & GRAZIANO. It's a shame, but the calibre of contestants this year is, now at least, very high and the judges' decisions will be based on the tiniest of margins. But Graziano has gone further than ever before and I reckon they'll be back on the tour, so it's not all bad. A very touching farewell speech and declarations of Friends For Life and Kym was off to hang up her heels.

Next week is the Semi Final. Who will fall at the final hurdle, have their dreams dashed at the last minute? Only one way to find out - join me next week. BUT not at the usual time and place. The live show is on SUNDAY instead and the results show on MONDAY night. I'll try to remember. Until then....

KEEP DANCING........

Taxi for Kym - one way to Weatherfield

Seven Slebs A'Swinging

 

Hello again, dance fans. Ready for Christmas yet? Come on, it's fewer than four weeks away now - stop lollygagging. I've had the sprouts on since March! We usually go for a curry for Christmas Day dinner, but have decided to stay in this year. Sainsbury's food order is booked and SOTH can show off his Food Tech skills by lending a hand while I make a dent in the Baileys. Added bonus that we don't have to get dressed. I mean, dressed up. We don't sit around the house in the nuddy! Not with all that gravy and custard sloshing round. I do have some standards.

I keep meaning to do a 70s style Christmas dinner to show SOTH what I endured enjoyed growing up. Glass of orange juice with some sliced up melon & glace cherry for starter, then turkey that's been in the oven 'on a low light' since Christmas Eve and is now so dry it's its own fire hazard, veg boiled so long it's all one unidentifiable mush and roasties that are still hard in the middle. Trifle for afters and a bottle of Blue Nun or Mateus Rose to wash it all down. Seven hours in the kitchen, food demolished in ten minutes. Watch the speech, fall asleep, turkey butties for supper and a blazing row before ten o'clock. Sorted. I'm still bitter I never got an Adventure Kit because they were 'for boys'.

This year I had the brilliant idea of ordering the gifts from me to HOTH in my name, so that when they arrived we'd know whose was whose and not spoil surprises by opening the wrong parcel. Which would have been fabulous if not for the fact that HOTH forgot to swap the name back on the delivery details and so everything has arrived addressed to me. We've had to get SOTH to open everything and sort it into different boxes. Next year everyone's getting a satsuma and a bag of nuts in a stocking.

So, back to Strictly. While seven couples remain, only six were dancing on Saturday. Kym has fallen to the dreaded 'vid and gets a bye. Wishing her a speedy recovery. She's probably tucked up in bed with a bowl of chicken soup and a hot toddy, having her fevered brow mopped by a devoted Graz lucky mare.

Will & Nancy started the proceedings with a Charleston to Hush by Kula Shaker which, spookily, was on the radio while I was typing this first bit up. Not really a Charleston song, really. I mean, it doesn't exactly scream 'screwball comedy dance', does it? That's because this wasn't THAT kind of Charley-stone. Nancy & the choreographers took this dance in a different direction and dimension. If this is the future of Charleston I'm not complaining. It was slick, sharp, polished and precise. Absolutely in sync with one another, Will & Nancy hit every single beat and step in a routine that was fast, technical, tight and controlled. All the usual steps were there, just as expected, but with a different feel. The Charleston meet The Matrix. Will had fab swivel and he was great in and out of hold this time. A cracking start to the post-Blackpool show, which does have a tendency to bring a slump in performances. A very good 38 out of 40 scored.

Dance off denizens Molly & Carlos followed with a Tango to Bad Guy by Nibbly Eyelash, sorry Billie Eilish. You have to admire Molly's resistance and her ability to keep on keeping on performing. This was a decent enough routine. Molly came out with tons of attack, passion and drama - a world apart from her previous 'Sandra Dee sweet girl' looks and style. It was a fast dance with some very technical content. There were some really tidy spins & turns, changes of direction and crisp staccato moves. Molly's feet were good and, in general, so were her top line and frame. There wasn't a huge amount of V shaping in hold but there were some nice Spanish lines and finishes. Unfortunately, and not that she'll care, I found it all a bit...boring. Good job I don't judge for a living because the panel loved it and awarded 35 out of 40. The couple's heart-shaped 'vote for us' pose is proper getting on me wick, though.

Ellie & Johannes gave us a Thelma & Louise themed Jive to Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison Fun fact, a colleague and I once got booed off karaoke singing this. We were in an advanced state of refreshment, though. We probably sounded worse than Liam Gallagher who, frankly, sounds like a live sheep being fed through a shredder. It looked like Ellie struggled with this dance. which didn't really have a lot of jive content. It was more like one of those 'shops with the middle aisle of tat' versions of a Jive. Probably called a Jave or a Juvo to avoid copyright infringement. To be fair, it was a fast, fun and frivolous routine, but Ellie's weight was in the wrong place, meaning her kick and flicks were dodgy and she lacked proper retraction. She went wrong several times and towards the end got a bit heavy and flat-footed. It was energetic and the pair looked like they were having fun, but this routine took a Thelma & Louise dive over a cliff, I'm afraid. Just 25 out of 40 from the judges.

Erm...JoJo - I think you missed the turning

Fleur & Vito followed with a Rumba to Too Lost In You by Sugababes, who have had so many different members they should be called Trigger's Broom Babes. I can't keep up. So, apparently, Fleur was dancing. I could only see Vito, myself. I jest (a bit). For my least favourite dance this did actually entertain me. It was a smooth routine, oozing sensuality and sultry moves. It was so hot, passionate & steamy it should have had a guidance warning before it started. I came over all unnecessary, which is never a good look. The routine was tricky and technical with lots of lovely light and shade. There were cucarachas, rumba walks and a nice Rumba Triangle, which is apparently a leg-shapey thing and not a sort of musical instrument Dave Arch And His Wunnerful Orchestra play. It wasn't perfect - Rumba Rules to be stuck to and all that. Fleur got a bit tight and tense in places and looked like she didn't breathe through the whole thing. Her timing and balance were good and her legs and feet quite lovely. There was a lack of fluidity, though, and the routine scored 35 out of 40. With Vito getting a bonus headbutt from an excited Fleur.

It's all a bit of a Rum(ba) do

Hamza & Jowita were up next with an Argentine Tango to Libertango by Bond. Which sounded a bit like the feem toon to Charlie's Angels, if you ask me. This was a smooth, controlled and fluid dance. led exceptionally well by Hamza - something Shirl was quick to point out at the end, saying he is the reason Jowita looks so good (so, you know, not like the eleventy billions of hours of training she's done since she was a nipper). There was, as always, a great connection between the pair and this transferred through the routine. Hamza was strong, powerful, brooding but also sensual and light on his feet. His ganchos were pretty good, but in some parts his legs were so high up around Jowita's waist it looked like he was auditioning to join The Ministry of Silly Walks.

                             

The footwork split the judges, too. Anton compared Hamza to a Bradford City centre forward and Shirley declared she'd love to dance with Hamza herself. A bit of a dip from the last couple of weeks and the couple got 34 out of 40.

Helen & Gorka closed the show with a Samba to Eso Beso by Emma Bunton. This was a cheeky, fun and frivolous routine, Helen having a kind of ditsy, Legally Blonde character at the start. It wasn't long before Gorka ripped his shirt open - just  when I'd got myself together after Vito - and joined the party. Helen had some decent shimmies and hips, but she should have gone SO much bigger, especially in the solo slots. It was all a bit...polite. There were some tricky steps and moves, light and shade, changes of pace and all that. But Helen was too stiff and stilted in parts, her weight was too far back and her legs needed to be straighter. A huge difference to last week and the judges scored accordingly. A measly - and just a bit nasty - five from Craig meant the pair only scored 29 out of 40. 

With no Kym the night was over before we knew it. The remaining pairs are all desperate to stay in for Musicals Week next Saturday (we'll take bets on what tired tropes they'll trot out later) and there was still an elimination to come even though Kym had had a bye. So who will be in the Quarter Finals? Read on, mon petit pals.

'Twas Sunday again. HOTH & I had a lazy morning before taking my fabulous mum in law out for a spot of lunch. See, I can do civilised every now and again. SOTH had gone ice-skating with college chums and it wasn't raining for once. Meanwhile, back at Strictyland, one celebrity had already packed their dance shoes and were probably nursing a giant commiseratory hangover. Who was it though?

The Sunturday Show started with a pro dance that started mostly monochrome then popped into colour as they stripped off coats, jumpers and the like. There were a LOT of clashing colours, though. Like they'd got dressed in a dark cupboard with sunglasses on. All grins and leaping about, it wasn't a bad start to the Results.

The Giant Redwood trees I had planted at the beginning were fully mature by the time Tess finally told us that the first person in the dance off was....

FLEUR AND VITO. This surely had to be one of those 'others will vote for her so' situations because she hadn't danced badly at all. Mind you, most people are as much of a fan as Rumba as I am, which isn't much. She looked absolutely crushed but said she wasn't surprised. It came as a surprise to Shirley who has performed a complete about face with Fleur/But, looking on the bright side, we would get to see Vito's Shirl-admired tushy again. Win, win.

Up in the Clauditorium Will was visibly thrilled and grateful to be in and Hamza confessed to not knowing any musicals. What will he end up doing? Hmmm. 

Our musical interlude this week was provided by Tom Grennan and Joel Corry - who, I am told, is a Disc Jockey (now you can see why it's abbreviated to DJ, doesn't sound quite as cool in full, does it? Much more Noel Edmonds than Calvin Harris).

A thousand galaxies were born, existed and died - the star systems, not the chocolate bars - before Vernon Kaye's missus announced that the second pair in danger were...

ELLIE & JOHANNES. Ah, it had to come, didn't it? The week after Blackpool is always the one where we start to lose the 'popular' celebrities from the ones who stand a chance of being in the final. Ellie looked like a stunned kipper last week when she got through, so being in the dance off sooner or later must have been in the back of her mind.

It was a bit cruel to leave Molly and Carlos right to the end, though. She must have thought she was in the dance off yet again! Usually, they announce last week's dancer off-er-er first thing. She was thrilled to be safe. Helen's lads are apparently getting better at maths adding up her scores. No reveals of next week's tunes, though. They must be trying to keep them as a surprise.

The Judges' bit was cancelled this week to keep the time down so the next World Cup match could be shown. Of which I could give no cares. We don't like / watch football in our house, not even Big Games. I know we're the exception rather than the rule and the vast majority love it. Me? I'd rather peel my skin off and paddle in the Dead Sea. 

I don't think you really need me to tell you the outcome of the dance off, do I? As much as I love Ellie and JoJo, they were outmatched, outdanced and outclassed by Fleur and Vito. The judges voted unanimously to save them and it was a very emotional goodbye to, Team Jellie.

Six couples remain to take part in the Musicals Week Quarter Finals (presuming Kym makes a recovery in time for next week). We're heading towards the sharp end of the competition and it's still anyone's Glitterball. Join me for the first Strictly of December which, for the very first time - because of the fubble - will be on FRIDAY, with the results on Saturday. Put that on your diaries, folks. Until then...

KEEP DANCING!

I don't think you're ready for this, Jellie

RIP Irene Cara, sadly passed away 25 November 2022.